Week Three

As a spring turns to summer and summer to fall, the inevitability of the seasons reminds us that, as always, Laurie is smacking out butts in football. Around the league:

The Kaboodles (Laurie), Gophirs (Rob) and Football Team (Elijah) are tied in first 2-0. The cellar dwellers are the pigskins, Fumblers and the Cough Drops--team owner names will not be mentioned to protect the innocent. Another tough luck loss for the Fumblers, but at least Kalvin wins the inaugural "J.J. Stokes Bruin Backbreaker" award--for having a perennial Bruin underachiever torpedo his team for a narrow loss (this week 4.85 points). Willie was the benefactor.

Retroactively, we will award the J.J. for week one as well. The winner: the Fumblers again. The stats: losing by 0.68 of a point with DeShaun Foster scoring only 1.10 points.

Condolences to Brent for the total and utter collapse of Philly. You were better off not starting McNabb (-1.63 points this week), but perhaps the boys in green will get their act together. I tell you that Chunky's Soup karma is drooping all over him like a bad stink (see T. Davis, K. Warner).

In the battle of the rookie kickers, Josh Brown (Football Team) out duals Seth Marler (The Cough Drops) 8-5. Incidentally, these two kickers out pointed every other starting rookie in the league. Coincidence? I think not. The rookie kicker strategy has always been a solid one. . .however weird draft day can be. In a different rookie battle, Tayler Jacobs (Fumblers) also "dueled" Kelley Washington (Bleed Blue) to a standstill. . .0-0. On the bright side, at least they didn't "McNabb" your teams.

This week's waiver priorities, based on Monday's standings:

10 The Cough Drops 0-2-0 .000 92.72 L-2
9 Fumblers 0-2-0 .000 93.89 L-2
8 flying pigskins 0-2-0 .000 131.38 L-2
7 Bleed Blue 1-1-0 .500 88.17 W-1
6 liusers 1-1-0 .500 108.68 L-1
5 Sleepas 1-1-0 .500 119.21 W-1
4 Stews Crew 2 1-1-0 .500 134.93 L-1
3 Football Team 2-0-0 1.000 150.61 W-2
2 Grant Gophirs 2-0-0 1.000 181.52 W-2
1 Kitna Kaboodle 2-0-0 1.000 202.24 W-2

Submit waiver claims by Wednesday night 11:59PM. After that I will unlock the rosters.